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Dear Abby: Guilt keeps spouse in wedding to man battling with PTSD

Dear Abby: Guilt keeps spouse in wedding to man battling with PTSD

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DEAR ABBY: i have already been hitched to my better half for 17 years. After a long period, we recognized he previously some despair problems. A decade ago, after he had been identified as having PTSD, he stopped working and has now been in the home from the time.

We work regular, settle the bills, look after the young kids, run the errands, drop the youngsters off at training, clean the home, every thing! He does absolutely absolutely nothing but rest. He remains during intercourse for several days at a time and showers once per week. We now haven’t slept when you look at the room that is same 5 years.

I’m so lonely. I hate being hitched to him, and I’m perhaps perhaps not sure exactly how their depression affects my young ones. He takes medication but will not view a specialist. I wish to keep and possess a life. Personally I think stuck in this wedding out of guilt. Just exactly What do I do? — HAD IT IN KENTUCKY

DEAR HAD IT: Make a consultation on your own with an authorized mental medical expert to talk about your position along with your shame. Please try this just before have psychological or real breakdown through the anxiety you will be under.

For your children’s sake — because you are all they have while I sympathize with your husband’s mental problems, the fact that he refuses to do all he can to fix them tells me it is time to take care of yourself. Because your husband’s meds are no longer working, he need to have mentioned that fact years ago towards the medical practitioner that has been prescribing them.

DEAR ABBY: For a friend’s birthday, we delivered a $150 food distribution present card, saying to place it toward dishes once I visited for 3 days the following week. He called, said I had been “cheap” and said it absolutely was perhaps not a “gift” if it included cash that could be allocated to myself.

Our company is brand new buddies and also have never ever exchanged gift ideas. Please assist me realize if I became improper. — MEANT PERFECTLY IN UTAH

DEAR MEANT WELL: You made a mistake that is honest. Nonetheless, everything you did was less improper than the new friend’s ungracious reaction, that has been simply plain insulting. Regarding the next gift-giving occasion — if you should be nevertheless friends — send him a guide on etiquette, only for him.

DEAR ABBY: i will be preparing a visit to see my buddy in England. We studied abroad 2 yrs ago, and I’m excited to go back to my old stomping grounds and reminisce.

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We got very near to this buddy while I happened to be there, and now we talk on Facebook once in awhile. Clearly, due to the distance, we aren’t close friends, but we still give consideration to ourselves “trans-Atlantic siblings.”

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I’m on a fairly budget that is tight wish to start preparing for expenses. Would it not be rude to ask her if i will stick with her? Or must I simply ask for suggested statements on places to remain to discover if she provides? — TOURIST IN TEXAS

DEAR TRAVELER: if she suggests it while it wouldn’t be rude to ask, I vote for the latter option and see. (She will probably.)

Abigail Van Buren

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